Sad news - my lovely friend passed away on Remembrance Sunday.
She had been so strong for so long and was just plain worn out.
Although I wanted her to be free of the 'prison' into which the cancer had put her, I wanted her how she was before she was ill, rather than gone.
MM and I went to be with her when she was 'leaving' but she beat us to it.
I think she made the traffic lights go red so that we didnt have to witness the end.
We spent some time with her and helped her family as best we could and then we went home and tried to sleep (she died at 3.30 am).
After laying looking at the ceiling for an hour we got up again.
I couldnt bring myself to watch the Remembrance Day Service but I did have the 3 minutes silence. Never has it been more poignant.
I am not grumpy (for once) - I am miserable.
Things keep tripping me up - certain songs especially.
I dont want to be a misery - she would have hated that.
I want her to carry on seeing the world through my eyes.
MM and I went to London for the weekend and how she would have loved Wicked and We Will Rock You.
How she would have 'oo'ed and 'ah'ed at the Xmas Lights.
How she would have raged at the actavists 'occupying' London.
How she would have got us all lost on the Tube and made us late for the Theatre.
She will not be gone while everything I do reminds me of her.
Love always, sleep well my Jean-Jeanie x
4 comments:
Oh Grumpy,
While reading your post and between the lines I could feel your pain. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Thinking of you Kate (Lyn) xx.
Thanks - much appreciated - xx
Just read this. So sorry to you have lost your special friend. xxx
Thanks Nicknick. I went to her house today and although all of her stuff is still there it feels so empty - I thought I would feel closer to her, but I dont. But, she would not want me to wallow so I will start to go forward and make plans and she will be with me always x
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